Episode 248 : Confession of an infatuated junkie

She might never read this; it is a good thing for me. And it is also a good thing that she is someone no one knows.

Never met, never talked on the phone. A couple of chat conversations and emails are all I can lay claim to.

Yet, there is this tugging that I am unable to wish away.

Two years on and still trying.

I know what she does and I know where she lives. I know some things about her that perhaps most people don't. Or delude myself that I do, that it is our secret.

I see her photographs and smile to myself. Because this is my secret.

And because it is my secret, it is a cross only I can bear.

There is nothing I can do. Or maybe want to as well.

Because you see, she's married now. To someone I know.

Someone once told me 'Just because a girl is taken or engaged, it doesn't mean the end of it'

True, but in some twisted way it does mean the end of something in my world.